No matter how hard we try, there may be instances where we feel ourselves getting hot around the collar. Whether it is because we haven’t learned how to go with the flow or due to an altercation with somebody we know, anger is often part of daily life.
Sometimes, this anger can transform into rage so suddenly that, upon reflection, we can’t identify why we reacted the way we did. This can lead to tense situations in which we say things we may not mean or behave in a destructive manner that may destroy relationships.
Because of this, it is vital to learn skills to help us cool down and keep our anger under control. Read on for some of the best ways to do this. Some are short-term tricks that can help defuse a situation, while others are life skills that we can practice to become generally less hot-tempered.
Quick Tips
Quick tips are strategies that can be employed in the moment to help buy time to assess the situation and your level of anger. These can be used to alleviate not only the emotional tension that is fueling your anger but also the physical tension that could be contributing to your seeing red.
Walk Away
One of the best quick tricks for combatting surging anger is simply walking away. This may not always be practical, such as if something at your workplace is causing the anger, but walking away is always best when the opportunity presents itself.
Doing this allows you to step away before you can say or do anything damaging. It also gives you a chance to take a breather without additional pressure from the situation or person causing the anger.
Engage in an Activity That Distracts You
While walking away can help defuse immediate tension, walking away and doing nothing can cause your mind to go into overdrive. When this happens, it may be easy to think about the injustice of a situation and justify why you are correct about feeling angry.
Walking away should always be followed by participating in an activity. Whether it’s playing at your favorite Michigan online casinos or hitting the gym for an intense workout, keeping busy helps distract you. By the time you’ve completed your activity, you may be more willing to see a situation or argument from another perspective and be better equipped to find a solution.
Breathe
Many studies have been done on how breathing techniques can affect our physical and emotional state. Taking deep, slow breaths can stimulate your parasympathetic nervous system and cause your body to relax and calm down.
This technique has the added advantage that you don’t need to leave the situation to practice it. Instead, while facing the issue that is causing you to feel anger, you can simply take a few deep breaths and continue dealing with it.
Clench and Relax
Our physical state often exaggerates our emotional state. Therefore, if we begin feeling angry, it may be because our muscles have tightened and we feel tense physically. This can add to the emotion and elevate simple irritation to outright rage.
Purposefully clenching our fists, leg muscles, and diaphragms before releasing them can provide some much-needed release. Repeating this for a short time can relieve physical tension and help us feel more relaxed and ready to deal with the source of our anger.
Talk to Somebody
Discussing the cause of your anger with somebody you trust and who is removed from the situation can help calm you and provide perspective. By speaking, your body will naturally calm down as you share the stress with somebody else.
At the same time, somebody who is looking in from the outside may see things in a different light. They can give you valuable insights into the situation and highlight where you may have overreacted or affirm where you are correct to stand your ground.
However, it is paramount to speak to somebody who is objectively neutral. Sharing your emotions with someone who is scared to tell you that you are wrong or who will help you justify your anger could worsen the feeling of rage.
Challenge Yourself
Another way to quickly keep your anger in check is to challenge it. Although it may take some practice to do this seamlessly, it can help you assess whether you should be reacting as strongly as you are.
When challenging your anger, ask yourself questions such as, “Have I understood the situation correctly?” or “Is my anger greater than the situation calls for?” or “Is there anything I can do to change the situation I am angry about?”
Such questions could help you see things from a different perspective. They can also help you see whether your anger is in line with what the situation calls for and if being angry about the situation will help resolve it.
Long-Term Methods
Quick tricks to deal with anger can help diffuse a situation but may not assist in dealing with deep-rooted anger issues. Learning long-term coping techniques is the best way to keep your anger in check over time.
Identify Triggers
In most instances, our anger is triggered by something specific. Whether it be the way somebody speaks to us or a particular occurrence, knowing what sets you off can help shield you from triggers and get a handle on anger before it rears its ugly head.
Identifying triggers can be done by looking back at situations that caused anger after you’ve calmed down. By finding the source of your anger, you can see if it is reoccurring and encourages more rage. Taking mental (or physical) notes will help you identify them early should they occur again.
Develop Communication Skills
Many agree that one of the leading causes of anger is miscommunication. Therefore, working on developing your communication skills so that you can clearly and effectively share why you are feeling angry is a great way to mitigate the anger.
With better communication, other parties involved in the scenario making you angry can better understand your emotions. This can help them explain another perspective or acknowledge and validate your feelings, which can reduce your anger level and lead to a much faster resolution.
